3 HOURS SLEEP

YES!! Thats how much sleep is in me right now! Its 5:23 in the morning, and I'm so glad that I'm not working today. I'm gonna be some contrary tho. Oh yeah, if you haven't heard, WE'RE MOVING!.... and I haven't been able to sleep since. Sheldon told me the news about three nights ago. I wasn't thrilled at all at the time he told me. With this check coming, and the next one, I had planned to get caught up with my debts. Its my own damn fault that I'm in so much right now, I let it catch up to me. I'm talking about student loans of course. I have three, and I'm only caught up on one....so far. Future Shop isn't even included in this now. I wanted to get caught up on my loans, apply for interest relief again, then I was thinking about maybe trying to save a bit of money. But we are moving. So ALL of that is put on the back burnner again! The night that Sheldon told me about moving, I paniced, like a normal person with very little "real world" expierece that I have, and cried all night. After finishing the dishes, I felt a little better. Not at the fact that the dishes were done, but becuase I had my mind occupied on something else for a little while, and gave me time to cool down. Sheldon asked me if I wanted to go for a walk and see this house. I agreed, and right at that moment, I felt it in the pit of my stomach, that I was going to love this house. So we walked there, and sure enough I fell in love with the house. At that point, I had only seen the outside of the house mind you, and I loved it already. So I sobbed a bit more, and said aloud "Oh fuck, we're moving". Sheldon sort of giggled at me. I think he only did that becuase he probably wasn't sure if I was losing my mind at that point. LOL. God love him. He knows just when to go along with me. Hahhaha, Jan knows what I mean. Anyway, on the way back to the apartment, we went to Irving so that I could buy a pack of smokes. YES I'm back on the pack! And I will be until all of this blows over, and I feel like I can relax...... mentally, that is.
However, we are moving into a beautiful home, and I would be upset if we couldn't have it after seeing it. Lesley, Sheldon, and I are off today, and we're all going over to clean the house, (not that its dirty), it's fairly clean already, but just to freshen it up a bit. Then we're going to move a few things into it. Its going to be a very busy and hectic day, and I'm going to be smoking like a chimney.
*sighs* oh my. I'm bursting for a piss. Based on my mental state right now, and lack of sleep, God only knows who or what will pass me on my way to the bathroom. I have such a wild imagination, and its going to give me a heart attack one of these days.
And Sheldon! Oh my lord, how people can sleep on contact, I'll never fuckin know. I envy him. I only wish I could sleep like him. Heh, I just wish that I could sleep.
So Sheldon didn't win the lottery again last night. I wasn't too impressed, but I wasn't surprised either. LOL
I went for a job interview today at another call center, called 'Infotel'. Its telemarking and they call businesses in the UK. It's $7 and hour plus commission, bonuses, and other benefits....whatever they are. Anwyay, 'Rob', the guy who interviewed me, told me at the end of my interview, that he wants to hire me. The hours are great, 6:30 am to 1:30 pm. That leaves so much time for a little second job there. But due to the financial situation I'm in, I'll have to turn it down. Its just not the right time now. You get your own desk there, none of this cubical shit, and you don't have to where a headset. How fuckin sweet is that? Isn't that just my luck tho? As soon as I try to move one step forward, it seems like something catches wind of it, grabs me by my shirt, and says, "where are you going honey?" and I end up taking a step back.
Am I sounding a little crazy at this point? Don't take heed to it, it's lack of sleep and worry talking. I hope this is the right thing that we're doing. This living here in St. John's, only seems like a dream to me anyway. I know one day I'm going to wake up and find myself in Bishop's again. Oh dear lord. If I ever come to the point where I'm that broke I have to move home, I seriously, seriously, will crack up! I hope it never, ever, comes to that.
Here I am, back to watching Sheldon sleep. He's so cute. I wants to jump on him and wake him up so that he can stay awake with me, so that I could talk him and have some company. So that I wouldn't feel so lonely. WE all know that can't be done. WE all know how contrary he gets when he dosen't sleep good. Poor fella. He had himself a mental break down the other day. I've never known, or seen Sheldon crack under pressure. That's two down, two more to go. This whole moving thing is stressing all of us out. It's Lesley's and Mike's turn to have theres now. I'm sure it will come. It's only natural I guess. It is a big change, and its going to cost us all a fortune. But it will all be worth it in the end. We will all have a beautiful home to live in. No more mold and no more German bitch Heidi.

Poetic Pains Wrote On 10:30 AM
|

Untitled

And I watch him walk away
LIke I used to back in the day
My stomach churns
As my heart yearns
"Don't cry, don't cry," I whisper to myself
Get through another day, you'll be alright
I'll be alright

Poetic Pains Wrote On 3:38 PM
|